Tips for Overcoming the Fear of Flying, One Wedding Dress at a Time

Most people wouldn’t guess this, but I’m actually pretty scared of flying. I developed a phobia a few years ago, and it’s never quite gone away.

I think people assume that since I’m traipsing across Europe, I skip happily to the plane, pull out my plush travel pillow, and whistle cheery Disney tunes as the plane takes off. In truth, it’s probably closer to a drama than anything Disney, and the theme of it is me clutching the armrests and sweating through any deodorant I wore that day.

But you know what?  It turns out that traveling overseas is difficult without planes (see: awkward swimmer). And I have decided that I love travel more than I fear flying.

So for all of you people out there who prefer to stay on the ground but love to travel…I get it. This is for you. Here is what has helped me with my fear of flying.

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Tips for Overcoming the Fear of Flying

1. Don’t feel guilty, embrace it. Being scared of flying isn’t a stupid or illogical thing – it’s just a biological reaction.  And before the calm flyers say anything, yes I do know all of the statistics on plane safety. And I am a logical person. I have degrees with real legit letters in them.  Yes, it is helpful to know that you’re flying on a safe airline. But a phobia doesn’t listen to statistics. So don’t beat yourself up if you’re still a little scared.
2. Learn what is happening on the plane, especially during takeoff and landing. Weird sounds or sensations can freak you out if you don’t know where they’re coming from. If you know what they are and what they mean, it’s easier to picture what is happening and know it’s normal. The book Flying without Fear: Effective Strategies to Get You Where You Need to Go helped me quite a bit.
3. 

   iPod packed full of encouraging podcasts

   Before the trip, download something new to watch or listen to during the flight. You can “reward” yourself with it during a certain point during the trip (See tip 5). Another tip is to save a book or audiobook that you’re excited read. I even bring “junk” magazines that are ridiculous, but entertaining.

4. Don’t watch any scary movies or news stories the week before you leave. Especially any movies or stories about planes. There’s no need to get yourself worked up. With most fears, it is the anticipation of the event that is worse than the event itself. Don’t put that junk into your mind. Watch happy things.
5. 

   Me watching “Say Yes to the Dress” during a flight

   Have a game plan. If you know that you’re going to get scared, create an “If…then…” so you’ll be prepared. Mine is this: “When I get scared by turbulence, I will watch a silly tv show on my netbook.” I come prepared with shows like “Say Yes to the Dress” – something fun that will distract me.

6. Use deep breathing techniques. This way you can still be frightened but not go into full-out panic mode. My legs used to go into spasms on flights because I was so tense. When I started breathing slowly, counting to ten, and relaxing my muscles (as much as possible), it helped the spasms a lot.
7. Look into herbal or over-the-counter aids. Now you should use these wisely and only take the recommended dosage. There are sleep aids and herbal calming remedies that many people use. I always do a test run of anything new on a day when I don’t fly in case I have a reaction. (On a side note, these usually just take the edge off of my flights a little bit). Options are kava (herbal), Dramamine, and Benadryl. Products such as JetZone Jet Lag Prevention Homeopathic claim to help with all aspects of jet lag, including anxiety and insomnia. Also, eating raw Ginger Chews will help with motion sickness. Don’t be afraid to talk to your doctor about prescription options such as Xanax as well.
8. Start with a small flight if you can.  It won’t be as overwhelming and you can count down the minutes if you need to. If you’re on a longer flight, you can break it up into segments in your mind. (In one hour, I will eat a snack or walk to the restroom).
9. Pay for internet (if available). More and more flights are offering onboard internet for at least part of the trip. Have a friend at home who will be available to online chat with you during the flight. You will feel less trapped and more connected to home.
10. REWARD YOURSELF. You did it – you flew! Now go buy yourself some cute shoes. Seriously.
11. Realize that it’s a process. There is no way to out-think most fears. You will probably gradually feel less nervous each time you fly. Realize that it’s a process and say, “I’m a heck of a nervous person today. That’s okay. I’m still getting on the plane.”

These are the things that have helped me. What has helped you with being scared on flights?

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